Caviar

I am tired…really tired…I am on the edge…everything is useless…I do not know what I am doing…I do not understand what is going around me…this can not be the end of my dreams…my future plans…ahhh…all what I have planed…ahhh…am I eating a sandwich…I can not taste anything anymore…my wife…emmm…yeah…why is life so hard…ahhh…my children…I need help…my lovely children…but what can I do…Nancy Agram is so sweet…I need a cigarette…I am nothing…ahhh…I have to buy a mobile phone…aha…I am exhausted…aha...I want to go out of this country…no…I have to go out…but how…I want to go to America…huh…no…I want to go to…to…to Dubai…no …maybe Kuwait…but how…no no no...my neighbors…my family…my people…I can not leave them here…it is only for a short time…earn money…yeah…money and come back…start my independent business…Magdy is not better than me…I will…yes I am dumb… wait a minute…I am pathetic...but who is responsible for this

Six Feet Under

I only have watched the first two seasons…but I have to say that "Six Feet Under" is one of the most well written TV dramas I ever watched …I could not miss an episode…created by the Oscar winning writer of "American Beauty" Alan Ball digs in the soul of the human being and gives the meaning of life a new shape…it is so real…weird…dark…and funny...all the characters are 3 dimensional…and for me every episode was a lesson for life...and death

Egyptian Gandhuevara

The citizen is a fly crashing endlessly in the back window of a moving car

Don't be FRESH

My bathroom is not made of porcelain…and it is not the best place to take a shower when you wake up every morning…but I felt humiliated when the worker who came to fix the heater threw the cigarette on the floor …my bathroom is like the streets of Egypt…it is dirty yes …but that does not mean to throw things on the street just because we are sure this will not make the condition better if we throw it in a basket…do you smoke…no thank you I do not smoke and I know my bathroom is shit

Sandstorm in Cairo

Welcome back my dear

I missed you so much...uhu

I love you very much

Oho...I can not live without you...uhu ohu uho


I can not breathe without you..oho oho...alo

uhu... you have the same color like my skin...alo

Alo...alo...where are you...can you see me...uhu...can you hear me...alo

Never use condoms

She is happy…and Egypt is happy too…people need to be fed, need to have health care, need to find a place to live, need to be educated, need to find jobs, need to be transported … and babies need to be delivered...and as average life expectancy is rising every year and more people immigrate from other Egyptian cities to Cairo...I am sure we are going to face a much bigger disaster than we have today…the census result is surprisingly not the problem…the problem is in the way we live…we do not want and will not leave the Nile Delta unless we are forced to do that…I can not live in Basata alone...I believe that more than 70 million Egyptians live in 5% of Egypt’s total area…wow…great thing isn’t it…we do not want to think for our future until we forget our past…and present

شويه رمم قولالات الأدب متربوش

لأ دى الناس بجحت بجد... بقه ليها لسان تتكلم و تشتم... ايه اللى حصل فى مزرعتى ... مالناس كانت ساكته و وديعه و راضيين باللى همه فيه... ايه بقه اللى حصل... يعنى فجأه فائوا و نزلوا يلبخوا فى الشارع...خلاص بقت موضه حكايه الصويت و النوم فى الشارع... والا جلهم ذكاء مفاجىء و احنا مش حاسين... اكيد اعدوا يتفرجوا على الدش كتير... ايوه الدش ده هوه اللى وراهم اللى بيحصل فى البلاد التانيه... و قال ايه عاوزين يعملوه هنا... و لما وعدتهم بشويه حاجات بقوا طماعين... جشعين... يا جشعيييين... و وصلت انهم يشتمونى كمان... انا اتشتم... ديه اخرتها...لأ... بس هنا خلاص و كفايه... قال بقوا يعرفوا كلمه حقوق و عمالين طول النهار يولولوا بيها فى الشارع... اول ما بسمعها نفسى بتغم عليه و انا ما بقاش فيه صحه للحاجات الفرغه دي... يظهر ان ضرب الفليب فلوبس جاب نتيجه عكسيه و قضى على البلاهه و ضمور المخ اللى كان عندهم... يخرب بيت اللى اقترح عليه نظام الفليب فلوبس... لكن على مين... استنوا بس لما تشوفوا النظام الجديد بتاعى...نظام خلص و استريح

Happy Beat Ten Day

I think I will beat ten in the coming lesson
Are you crazy…are you not afraid that the teacher could know about it
No…because I will beat ten with my mind…so he will never know…can you do that
I will try it
And when are you going to beat ten today
I do not know…maybe before I go home…or before the lunch
But do not forget to beat ten today…you know…today everyone will beat ten…it is cool…so cool…isn’t it
Of course it is…I always wanted to have the beat ten day… imagine everyone beating ten…ha...and do you know why it’s unique …because it is only in our country
No…you are kidding
Yes…I am sure…we are the first country to have the beat ten day
But not all women will celebrate and beat ten today
Yeah…it will be hard for them…and for you of course…you will only beat seven…ha ha ha
Huh…And your father
My father has beaten ten before the breakfast…but I am sure most people will beat after work…to enjoy the beat ten day…I heard there will be great beat ten day parties at night…we should go out tonight
Yeah…
I do not understand why they did not make it a vacation … next year they have to make it an official national holiday
Especially for you…because next year you will be able to celebrate it for the first time in your life…ha ha ha
Yeah man…citizens need to have that day free… to celebrate and relax the beat ten day…
I do not need it…for me everyday is a beat ten day

Close your eyes

I was in the centre yesterday waiting for the private teacher to come...he is always late…students were going in and out …talking…laughing…shouting…but these two young men were so concentrated in their prayers-not affected by the noise and movements of the students -as if they were in another time and place...in another peaceful and calm world...when they came back from their soul journey they continued their work in the centre

11

لو لم اكن عاهره ، لوددت ان اكون مغتصبه

52

لو لم اكن يهوديا ، لوددت ان اكون ملحدا

69

لو لم اكن سودانيا ، لوددت ان اكون صوماليا

لأ و الله

قولت للراجل بتاع التاكسى بعد ما وصلنى: معاك فكه خمسه جنيه
الراجل: لأ و الله
قولتله: طب معاك كام
قاللى: معيش حاجه
قولت: معقول معكش اى فلوس
قال: ايوه…مأصل انا قولت حيجيلى فلوس من الزبون
قولت: يعنى ينفع حد ينزل من البيت و هوه معهوش اى مليم…افرض ان البنزين خلص
قال: خلاص يبقى ربنا عايز كده
واحده بتشحت: حاجه لله
قولت: طب استنى لما ادى للراجل فلوسه الأول…استنى هنه بقه لما اشوف فكه
قولت لراجل واقف فى الشارع: الاقى مع حضرتك فكه خمسه
الراجل: لأ و الله
لست ماشيه فى الشارع: الاقى مع حضرتك فكه خمسه
الست : لأ و الله
لتلت بنات ماشيين فى الشارع: الاقى مع اى حد فيكم فكه خمسه
البنات: لأ و الله
لكاشير فى كافيه: معاك فكه خمسه
الكاشير: لأ و الله
لراجل بيشتغل فى محل ملابس للرجال: الاقى مع حضرتك فكه خمسه جنيه
الراجل : لأ و الله
اعت اسأل كذا واحد و اعت اعدهم و كله بيقول: لأ والله...اكنهم عايزين يقولولى:لأ مش معانا+هو انت مش مصدقنا...طب و الله العظيم مش معانا...باختصار علشان كل واحد مشغول = لأ والله...احتماليه 67 % انى احنا بنرد على هذا السؤال بهذا الجواب بدون وعى = احنا اتعودنا نرد كده
رحت للراجل بتاع التاكسى و اعت جنبه و قولتله
سألت خمسه و عشرين بنى ادم ماشى فى الشارع و ولا واحد فيهم معاه فكه خمسه جنيه…ولا واحد فيهم معاه فى جيبه شويه جنيهات أو انصاص جنيه…اصل احنا شعب غنى مابنشلش إلا بالعشرينات و الخمسينات و الميات
الراجل بتاع التاكسى: خلاص يا بيه…خليها عليه المرادى
قولت: انت عارف…طول محنه كده كسلانين و مش عاوزين نساعد بعض…حنفضل فى اللحنه فيه ده
الراجل بتاع التاكسى: هوه احنه فى ايه… بس ممكن فعلا محدش يكون معاه فكه
قولتله: بص…انا حسأل خمسه كمان و لو مافيش ممكن نروح بعدها لبنزينه ادام نفك
سألت راجل فى الشارع: لأ و الله
سألت الشحاته فى الشارع على فكه خمسه بصتلى بأستغراب و اندهاش و قالتلى: لأ و الله
وقفت ميكروبص ماشى فى الشارع قاللى : انت مش حتركب
بصيت على الفكات الكتير اللى فى ايديه و قولتله: معاك فكه خمسه
مردش عليه و مشى
وقفت تاكسى و قولتله: انت اخر واحد…معاك فكه خمسه
قاللى: لأ و الله
مشيت بعيد لغايه سوبر ماركت و قولت للبياع: الائى معاك فكه خمسه
قاللى: لأ و الله
قولت له: طب انا حشترى حاجه
قاللى : برضه معيش فكه خمسه
لقيت راجل عجوز شكله صاحب السوبر ماركت سألته عن فكه خمسه
قاللى: استنه كده لما اشوف
و طلع كل الفلوس اللى معاه و كان بينهم جنيهات فكه ادهالى
قولتله:الف الف شكر…انت الفائز معانا النهارده…لازم اخدلك صوره
الراجل العجوز اتبصت
رجعت للراجل بتاع التاكس و ادتله تلاته جنيه
الراجل بتاع التاكسى مشى و هوه بيبتسم
ياترى لو حد سألنى على فكه بعد كده حقوله ايه

Don't wake up

...for them…if they have to
Why are you so pessimistic?
I am not. This is the truth, but they do not want to see it.
Let me ask you…do you think they have a chance to wake up.
No…not in the coming 20 years…maybe after that.
I see…why do you think so?
Well…because if they really want to do something…they have to start with the kids…and start right now…because it is already late…they have to educate them in a way…that let them be an intelligent…enthusiastic and powerful generation…but it will take a long long time to see the effect…the funny thing …till now they did not start anything at all…why…because they do not know the importance of that …they are sleeping
And what about the young generation today?
Huh…they are like blind chicken…crashing into each other…they are weak…very weak…they are very good in dreaming…but they do nothing…and because they are free and believe too much …they involve themselves in political and religious issues…they think they can do something…but they can’t…I am afraid to say...they are waiting for someone to rescue them
Don’t you think you are too…
Let me finish…they do not understand who is fighting with them…Egyptians against Egyptians…they tell me: are you crazy…they hate each other…they kill each other…they torture each other…they beat each other…why…because they are not educated…not enlightened…
But don’t you think there are few enlightened Egyptians out there that…
I know what you are going to say…they have no effect…they are wasting their time in this country...they are not even 1% of the population…what are they going to do…
Ok…and what about hoping to ...

الله يقرفكم زى ما قرفتونى

ضاعت عليه المحاضرات...و ضاع عليه الدرس...و ضاع عليه اليوم و امبارح و المستقبل كله... و مشيت النهارده اكتر من خمسه كيلو على رجليه...و عرقت و غرقت فى شبر ميه...و كنت حاسس انى ملزق و الناس ملزقه فيه...و حاجه تقرف...هوه فيه ايه...هه...ممكن اعرف فيه ايه...كبرى 6 اكتوبر مقفول...كوبرى الجامعه مقفول...الشوارع كلها مهنجه...و الناس كلها متشنجه...دى حاجه تقرف...ولا ليه نفس اروح الكليه...و لا ليه نفس اذاكر...و لا ليه نفس خلاص اعمل اى حاجه...خلاص...كفايه بقه...انا زهقت...زهقت بجد...اه و الله زهقت...خلاص مبقاش فى فايده...قال بيفرقعوا بومب قال... بلا نيله

An orphan named Sinai

Am I happy ?

Am I free ?

Am I Egypt ?

الفشفاط فشطنى

لقيت الست حتموت فى البيسين لما شعرها لزق فى الشفاط تحت الميه و معرفتش تاخد نفس روحت مدلها قبله الحياه وحاولت اطلع شعرها المحشور معرفتش فجبت مقص و قصيت شعرها و أنقذتها و لما فاءت لطشتنى بالقلم و قالتلى ده انت مش بس قليل الأدب و بوستنى تحت الميه لأ وكمان ندل و حقير ابن وسخه قصيت كل شعرى

My life in this country in one sentence

Someone asked me once: “Can you describe your life in your country in one sentence?”
I told him: “Living in this country is like being captured in a room with tightly locked windows and being forced to eat your diarrheatic stool to survive the rest of your life.”

MOTU

My hero is He-Man…the most powerful man in the universe…he is half earthling half eternian …and She-Ra …hmmm…and his Battlecat… and his enemy Skeletor…this was my world back in 1984…the world Eternia…I was one of the first who had these things in Egypt…and I was proud of that…all my friends came to my home to see my hero…they thought I was powerful too because I was the only one who had the real Castle Grayskull… I still have Castle Grayskull… they gave me a lot of gifts to be closer to me…and to have the opportunity to come more to my home to see the world Eternia…until one day that friend invited us to show the first screening of Masters of the Universe in Egypt…of course I was mad…because he stole the show from me…and there were always fights because of that…until one day my hero disappeared…vanished…well today I need my real living superhero…I need him so much

Taxi ( part 2 )

He was a young man in the middle twenties …graduated from the faculty of commerce …a taxi driver and…well he began to tell me his thoughts:

“I want to marry…but I do not trust any woman…most of them are bad girls…bitches…I had a lot of sex…and now I am getting used to it…I am getting bored…now I wanna try it with s-ms…do you know where I can find them…I know they are out there...where do you live …there is a lot of dirt out there…have you tried things like that before…but you know man…how can I make a family and we do not have money…and at the same time I can have sex without having any responsibilities…what do you study…ya…you know kids and obligations and stuff like that…oh no…do not ask me about religion…look man…I am still young…how old are you…oh…but you look younger …why are you taking this picture…oh…blog…I never heard of it before…aha…please don’t tell me these boring phrases…this is a sin …and this is not a sin...where are your ethics…look what is happening in this country…I am not the only bad guy here…there are all bad out there…they are stealing our money…there is unfairness…yes…it is hot today…no…this is not my taxi …I have change…do you live here…no…I am just asking…”

It is hard not to cry

I heard him last summer in Europe…and his voice never came out of my mind…
He is a story of success…he has gone from being a soldier in Kosovo to pallbearer for the Queen in England to a superstar in the U.K. in an amazingly short period of time
Oprah told James Blunt: “I was minding my own business when I got a call and someone said this is something you should hear.”
What a fantastic performance…more than perfection…James Blunt singing his final song (Goodbye my lover) in the Oprah Winfrey Show…he sang with a unique voice, enriched with true feelings and so overwhelming …he was playing piano , singing ,dreaming and crying at the same time…I tried not to cry but I failed...this song is connected with a great loss in my life...I looked to my mother who was watching the show with me…and her eyes were full of tears…the audiences in the show were mesmerized and I think they were crying for sure…his album “ Back to Bedlam “ is a must hear

Dear Mody

I am shocked...I was worried that this could happen to you…I should have helped you…god be with you …I will never forget you …take care of yourself …never forget that god is always with you…faith will keep you strong…I am sure we will meet again (isa)…very soon… till then my friend

This life is torshy

It is going to be a hard , hot and long day…and I have a lot of things to do…and as you know the bureaucracy in this country…I have papers to be signed…and other papers to be stamped…and other papers to be checked…and @%^&#...and 193#@### …bla bla bla…and I have to wait…stay in long lines…and shout…and smile…and run between the offices...and give tips…but to have the energy and patience to do that…I have first to eat my on the run fast-breakfast ( foul and tameya sandwiches with torshy)…the torshy is very important for me…because it makes me more alert and concentrated…do you want to have one…take this…please...come on…hmmm…delicious

OM SAID ( M.I.E )

I liked many things in this combination...the 2 symbolic pictures behind...the full-cold-far cup of tea...all the potatoes left on the ground ... her weight... the fragile basket she is sitting on...and working in public
She had a sharp big knife in her hand...not only to make potato chips ...but also to use it as a defense weapon...or to threaten anyone… as in my case when she saw me take that picture...thank god I am still alive

Conditioning

Our friendship broke 3 and half years ago...but there was always respect between the two of us...today I met him...one of my best friends...we were like brothers...we knew everything about each other...we had dreams...we had enthusiasm and were active to do everything to reach our goals...he was surprised that I wanted to meet him again....he even told me that it is not the right time to talk about the past ....because we have our final exams...but I was happy today that he listened to me...and agreed to open a new white page for our friendship...we talked...discussed...I told him all the things that happened to me in the last 3 years...I was astonished that he did not change at all...his way of thinking and opinions...and I was amazed from the fact that he does not see anything wrong in this country...and he does not feel anything unacceptable or harmful in the condition we are living in...I do not know how to describe it...maybe acceptance...toleration....or maybe a kind of adaptation...I told him that I am jealous of his status...should I

Please shut the F@#$ up

Talking...talking...talking...that is the only thing we do...we talk too much...we talk all the time...we have so many newspapers and magazines only for people to talk...we have lots of TV talk shows only for guests to talk...talk talk talk...we keep on talking about our problems ...we keep on talking about our plans...we keep on talking about the things we are going to do and the things we are not going to do...we keep on talking about the future...but we do nothing...we do a big NOTHING...and an evidence for that is for instance me...look what I am doing right now...I am talking about an Egyptian habit many people already talked about...but I am talking about it again...why...because I am still in Egypt

واو طه نون

A homeland is the concept of the territory to which one belongs; usually, the country in which a particular nationality was born, an environment offering security , rights and happiness.
And I was !!! lucky !!! to be born on this country...automatically , traditionally and ethically forced to love and be faithful for it as long as I live...and if I do not do that I will take the death sentence and after my execution I will be hated from most of the people on planet earth.
I am still searching for my homeland…till I find it…the security , rights and happiness.

Successful ASKINATION trial

When I started the project ( ASKINATION )...I never thought that someone will respond...it was an anonymous creature...I was very happy...because it gave me hope that there are some creatures out there that are ready to communicate...willing to understand...yet I am not sure he did understand me...but at least he made the first contact with me...in this alienated community

The flowers of Quran

I found the magical cure to survive my daily life in Egypt…I saw it in the Omar Sharif's movie " Monsieur Ibrahim et les fleurs du Coran" 2 years ago…but I never used it…today I tried it…and I succeeded...
I smile
I smile when I go…I smile when I talk…I smile when I meet anyone…I smile to my colleges…I smile to the taxi driver…I smile to all the people on the street…I know that some look to me in a strange way…as if they think I am euphoric or took something to be high…but they are few…and it made a surprising effect on my surroundings…everyone is friendly to me…I am more confident…people respect me more…help me more…like me more...I try to smile in a normal way…not to overact it…I try to make my smile come from my heart…I try to remember all the beautiful things in my head…all my dreams…well...let us see how long I could do that
By the way…this movie is awesome…it’s a message to love our life and to celebrate what holds us together rather than what pulls us apart